"Romance Redefined"

"She never won prom queen or caught the eye of the star football player, and he never understood why. To him, she was the most stunning girl that had ever walked the earth. But in her eyes, she was nothing special. Insecurities and shame had haunted her for years. Oh, but in his eyes, she was perfection.

Everywhere the couple went, people couldn’t help but notice a relationship that was unlike anything the most romantic movie had ever portrayed. After ten years of marriage, he was still enthralled by her. The way she walked, the way she laughed, the way she cried and the way she fell asleep in his arms. It captivated him in a way that surpassed his wildest dreams. To him, she was the essence of beauty. And with him, she truly felt beautiful.

One winter, she fell ill. The disease was incurable. Doctors would not allow for her to have any contact with anyone lest they fall ill also. Completely devastated in the deepest sense, the strongest warning could not stop him. No, he refused to live without her. Nothing could keep him from her. Not for a second did he hesitate to shove past the nurses to stand by her bedside, stroking her face in the same way that he had every night since they had been married. He had promised "until death do us part," and he meant it.

Just as the trees are budding and flowers are blossoming around us, exactly as they do year after year, God never fails to come through on His promises. He is the author of romance. He wrote the first love story, and ever since, men and women have spent their lives attempting to recapture the bliss of the greatest event in history.

Here in lies the reality of our situation. God climbed into our hospital beds. He came down into our sickness. He gave up His right to life so that He can hold us in His arms. So that we would have a hand to hold onto when school gets crazy, things seem out of control or when death seems to be our only way of escape. He wants to know us. He wants to know me. He wants me to look deep into His eyes and know that everything is okay. He wants to set us free, and he wants to see us enjoying the freedom He Himself purchased for us.

He even went a step further than the man in my little illustration. My God did not simply stand by my bedside when I was on my death bed. He climbed into my bed. And since there was not room for both of us, He pushed me off and took my place. Today, I stand healed, completely captivated by the One whose love was so much greater than anything I could ever know or imagine.

Are you living as if the God of the universe suffered in your place?

Have you truly embraced the freedom that was purchased for you on the cross?

**If you've never had a chance to read this love story for yourself, I would highly recommend it. Start off with the book of John and let yourself be captivated by the beauty of the Lover that whispers your name."

~this was written by my dear friend Ashley Howell, and to me it truly captures the essence of the type of love that our Creator has for us and the picture of a relationship with Him... I could not help sharing...

Abundance in Him

"My mouth will tell of your righteous acts,

of your deeds of salvation all the day,

for their number is past my knowledge"

~Psalm 71:15

As I type this, my heart is overflowing.  I have witnessed God in so many ways over the past few days, I don't even know where to begin.  If you would have been on the other end of my hour long phone conversation this evening, you would know what I mean.  Meagan, a CRU staff member from Texas who is going to Santa Cruz this summer, called me to check in on the process, and we discussed the radical things that God has been doing, and the ways that He has shown up in some pretty profound ways.

I am just resting in awe of Him this week, taking a step back to process all that God has been doing just over the past week in my life... so much.  This verse above (Psalm 71:15) hit home with me as I have witnessed the Lord recently...I am resting in what He continues to present me, opening my eyes to the many greater things He is doing in hearts and lives around me.  It's as if He is saying just wait, look for what I am doing around you...witness my hand moving here... I am with you...take comfort in each thing I bring your way...just wait, this is only a glimpse of what is to come.  Enjoy being part of my greater plan...this is Me.

The other day, my "Jesus Calling" devotional ended with:  "There is abundant life in my presence today."  I am trying to approach each day looking for what He has in store, and I have been delighting so much in seeing my Father present Himself in the craziest, most beautiful ways... His timing is so perfect.  In an effort to convey my heart right now, I decided to just write...and this is where my "pen" took me...

God YOU are my joy

in You, i have freedom and adventure.

my heart explodes, You have infused me with a love that overflows,

inner joy that cannot be contained; i must praise You.

You have made me to be in relationship with You--

I could think of nothing more satisfying, nothing more exciting

than being part of the plan that You have designed before me--

You know me so well.  How could I not want to follow You?

Is a man to choose "choice A"- hopelessly following himself every day?

Or

Is man to choose "choice B": the steadfast, loving, fulfilling path of the Creator & Sustainer,

the One who knit me together in the womb, formed me, knows me...

 better than I know myself.

Do I choose me, or do I choose You?  

Your word says to give it all up, to surrender it all to You--

 that means to give up "me" too.

my selfish ambition, my plans, my idols, my place

Lord, please make me "less" and make You "more";

I only seek to see Your face

for I am a sinner, saved only by Your grace...

What sounds better-- choice A or choice B? 

Choice B is that You, the God of all creation...wants a relationship with me

I don't know about you, but I choose B!

I was once blinded by sin, but now I see...

I am a sinner-- one who fails, I fail every day,

 I lose my focus on You, I constantly go astray.

But God you are faithful-- You pick me right up. You choose me to love and you fill up my cup. 

 Your greatness, Your ability to heal, restore, renew

is before me, behind me, and in front of me too.

You guide me and provide for me,

You are everlasting, consistent, and do not hide from me

You are available, loving, and merciful

You strech out your arms wide for me...

Lord, You even live inside of me!

How abundantly, how generously You provide for me...

I cannot praise You enough.

You fill my heart, You overflow my cup....how abundant is Your love.... 

inspiration from verses:

*Psalm 139:13-14

Psalm 23:5

Matthew 10:34-39

Catching up to where I am now...

Today I have overheard many conversations about the end of the semester, and how little time there is left in this year.  It has begun to really hit me about how close Summer Project really is.... I leave in 7 weeks!!!  Wow.  As I have received more and more information about Santa Cruz and all of the plans for the summer, I have also had the chance to meet many of the other students that will be going there with me this summer from NCSU.  It has been so awesome to hear how God has been working in their lives, and to also hear the background as to how they ended up applying for and choosing Santa Cruz for the summer.  Many of the people that are going from NC State, I did not know beforehand, so I have loved the chance to meet these awesome new friends and begin relationships that are sure to grow deeper this summer.  After hearing about how others were led to the Santa Cruz project this summer,  I figured that I would share that with you about my life over the past 2 years leading up to this summer, as many of you may be hearing about Summer Project for the first time through a letter or on this blog!  I am overjoyed to share all that God is/has been doing in my life with you, and to have you join me on this exciting adventure! :)

Background:

Things really began to change at the end of my senior year of high school, when God began to move in my life in ways that I had never experienced before.  The college application & decision process had worn me out.  I had reached a place where the plans that I had made for myself we not exactly panning out, and I was beyond exhausted after 4 years of trying to steer and secure my own future.  Through that process, the Lord brought me to a place where I began to completely surrender and let go of things that I had tried to control and plan out for so long.  He led me to NC State, an unexpected choice for someone more interested in humanities than math/science, and although I really had no idea why He had led me there or what I would do,  I had to truly rely on Him and trust that He had a plan for me there.  I could not see it myself (which definitely scared me at first!) but God is so sovereign, and it was not long before He started to piece together the beginning of the most beautiful and remarkable chapter in my life...

"Trust in the Lord with all of your heart

and lean not on your own understanding.

In all your ways acknowledge Him, 

and He will make your paths straight"

~Proverbs 3:5-6

Freshman year, God opened my eyes to many things, mainly my desperate need for Him and His saving grace!  He placed people in my life who challenged me in my spiritual growth, and led me to a Gospel-teaching church where I began to learn so much about Him, and became captivated by His Word.  Early on in the year, I got plugged in to Campus Crusade for Christ, a christian ministry on campus, where I joined a Bible study, and met many other christians, who have become such an encouraging community and have supported me and challenged me in my walk.  I heard about Summer Project at worship one Thursday night, and I was captivated at the thought of serving God in that way.  I had never been drawn to anything quite like it before, and wanted to know more about it.  Since I already had summer plans, I began praying about the following summer and what God may have in store.

Flash forward to December 2011...through a series of wonderful events, encouragement from friends, and lots of prayer, I felt strongly about applying for Summer Project, but did not know what location to even apply for.  There are SO many stateside and international summer projects, but after talking to friends, I decided that going alongside other NCSU students would be a good option, considering we could continue friendships and whatnot after the summer ended, and it would be nice to have friends around who experienced the same thing after such an influential summer.  So I prayed.  I prayed for answers and direction, guidance and encouragement.  After attending Encounter, Campus Crusade's winter conference, I felt very drawn to Santa Cruz, and ended up filling out the application and submitting it before Christmas break ended. 

 Six weeks later, I heard the news that I had been accepted!!! (See previous post :)) and the prospect of going to California began to get real.  Letters have been sent out, prayers are continuing to be prayed, and God has not ceased to work and faithfully to provide. Since being accepted, I have (just recently) booked my flight, been offered employment (!), and seen the Lord remind me of His hand in all of this.

This year...

The word that I selected for 2012 was "challenge"

--> I want to challenge myself spiritually.  To constantly be growing in my relationship with Him.  I want to trust in the Lord with all that I am.  Completely surrender myself to Him-- for His glory.  For Him to use me in whatever way He will, following whatever plan He has for my life.  This year, I am abandoning more of "me" and seeking more of Him.  That means trusting Him...really trusting Him.  Loving Him.  Investing time with Him.  Drawing near to Him.  Learning more about Him.  Serving Him.  Seeking guidance, wisdom, & growth through His Word.  This summer will most definitely be a step of faith, as I trust in the Lord to not only provide financially for the trip, but also to lead me and take care of me through the process!  It has already been a beautiful experience...He is so faithful, and I have already begun to see Him work in some incredible ways. 

I cannot wait to share more with you about this process, and I hope that you will join me in prayer over this summer, and in sharing this experience with me, even if it is just through this blog!  I will do my best to update as often as possible, and to share some of what God is doing each step of the way.  I am so very thankful for all of my family member, friends, and supporters, who have encouraged me, prayed for me, and supported me to make this Project possible.  

*Feel free to comment on here, to "follow" this blog, etc. -- this is the main form of communication that I will be using this summer, as I will probably disable my Facebook temporarily!

Summer Project News!

I heard THE news last Tuesday (Feb. 21)!!  Sal (one of the Summer Project directors) called me on Tuesday evening while I was in the dining hall, and asked if it was a good time to talk about Summer Project (anytime is a good time :))!  I was caught completely off-guard, and left mid-dinner to walk outside and discuss further.  After talking about the Lord, what He has been teaching me, and many other things, I found that I had wondered over to a grassy area by myself.  After receiving acceptance to Santa Cruz Summer Project, I spent the next few minutes praising God for the opportunity to serve Him in this way.  I prayed over the Project, the process of preparation, and God's provision, for my future co-workers, roommates, and everything to come in the next few months. 

I had expected "the moment" where I found out about Project to consist of lots of jumping, screaming, and excitement.  While I was by all means excited, I found myself deeply humbled more than anything else.  Earlier in the week, Campus Crusade had posted a devotional guide on "God's Holiness" to prepare our hearts throughout the week for Praise & Worship night that Thursday night.  So after reading and reflecting on scripture about God's holiness that week, I found that God was using that to also prepare me for receiving this news.  Revelation 4 & 5 were fresh on my heart, and all I could think of was this particular passage & image:

"Then I looked, and I heard around the throne and the living creatures and the elders the voice of many angels, numbering myriads of myriads and thousands of thousands, saying with a loud voice, “Worthy is the Lamb who was slain, to receive power and wealth and wisdom and might and honor and glory and blessing!” And I heard every creature in heaven and on earth and under the earth and in the sea, and all that is in them, saying, “To him who sits on the throne and to the Lamb be blessing and honor and glory and might forever and ever!” And the four living creatures said, “Amen!” and the elders fell down and worshiped."

-Revelation 5:11-14 

I am humbled by the opportunity to serve such a holy God.  This summer will surely be out of my comfort zone in so many ways, but I cannot wait to see what He has in store.  I feel blessed that the Savior of the universe, who is sovereign over all things, chooses and desires to have a relationship with me, and that although He by no means needs to use us to accomplish His will, He delights in working through us and allowing us to be part of His plan.  What a privilege to serve a God that is alive and active- who loves us more than we can ever comprehend!  Praying that He will use this summer to glorify Him and to bring others into relationship with Him;  that He will open the hearts of the people in Santa Cruz, and work in mighty ways!

"For what we proclaim is not ourselves, but Jesus Christ as Lord, with ourselves as your servants for Jesus' sake." ~ 2 Corinthians 4:5
 

In Christ,
Molly

Update on Life!

It has been quite some time since i have posted, but that is not because I have nothing to say, but just so much to write! :)  the Lord has really been doing some incredible things...not only in my life, but in the lives of the many college students around me, their families, and our campus as a whole.  It seems like most days I either hear about, experience, or witness God working in some way.  I continue to be in awe of Him, and needless to say, He has been teaching me a lot.  One of the main things I have felt Him teaching me lately has been His power to work in anything.  All we have to do is ask, trust, and believe that He will, in fact, work! (James 1:5-6)

One of the biggest blessings this year has been the group of girls that Danielle and I have had the opportunity to meet with each week and lead in Bible Study.  These girls are amazing, and they encourage me so much.  I am continually overwhelmed by God's grace and His providence each week when we gather to spend a few hours together learning and growing, laughing and enjoying and building upon our friendships rooted in Christ.

 

Our Bible Study :)

Each week, I look forward to hearing and seeing how God is working in their lives, praising Him for the chance to meet, learn, and fellowship in His name.  We are currently studying how we can "break the mold" in each area of our lives, and go against what the world calls us to do and live for, so that we can truly seek to follow the God who calls us to follow him.

Something that the Lord has also been working on my heart about has been Summer Project through Campus Crusade for Christ (now known as CRU).  I remember a previous post that I had on this blog last year, where I had felt that the Lord had really placed the desire in my heart to apply for a Summer Project.  After praying over it for about a year, I applied to the Summer Project in Santa Cruz, California!  The sequence of events leading up to this decision is nothing short of God's hand in the matter, as everything has gone so smoothly and He has given me so much peace.  By the way it has all come together, I know that God has so much in store, and I am excited to be able to serve Him in this way this summer if it is His will.  I am scheduled to hear back within the next 2 weeks (end of February), after officially submitting my application in early January.  Praying for what is to come and that He will be glorified every step of the way.  I will most definitely be keeping this page more up to date as the year continues! :)

In Christ,

Molly

 

Great is Your faithfulness...

"I may be weak, but your spirit's strong in me

  My flesh may fail, but my God, You never will"

It is amazing how God chooses to use us when we feel weak and unprepared! So often I think that I could prepare myself more by constantly memorizing scripture, or that I should be more prepared and have answers to all the tough questions that may come up in conversation. And those things are important.  Still, sometimes I don't feel like I am conveying things effectively, or my wording is choppy, or my thoughts aren't clearly translated in conversation.  I worry that I am not conveying Him as I could.  But then I remember the verse that is taped to the flip-down sun visor thing in my car... 

"My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." (2 Corinthians 12:9)

It is by His grace and the power of the Spirit that His love is translated to others.  While God calls us to be in His Word and to delight in Him and spend time with Him, it is so reassuring to know that He is still working through us even when we fail at fulfilling our witness, or when we waste time, focus on the wrong things, or make mistakes, ultimately not reflecting Him.  But the beautiful truth is that God is still God, and God is faithful, even while people are faithless!  He promises to provide for us and to equip us with what we need to serve Him... "...my power is made perfect in weakness."  Praise God!  

"...Whoever abides in me, and I in him, he it is that bears much fruit, for apart from me you can do nothing." (John 15:5)

Lately I have just been praising Him for answering prayers and for showing me how faithful He is to those who love Him.  Lately, He has really been revealing to me the power of prayer by showing me first-hand how He has taken care of those that I have been lifting up to Him.  Right when I feel like i am not hearing or seeing answers, God blows my mind by showing me that He is in control and that He has been attending to my prayers.  It is SO COOL to serve a God that is alive and active!!! 

At church the other day, one of the college pastors asked us to ponder upon something-- He asked us how our world would be different if all of our prayers within the last 30 days were answered...would we have just have been able to get through a test... or would there be peace within all families?  would there be zero unemployment?  would people be saved? would incurable sicknesses be cured?  would trials be overcome?  In other words, we should pray eagerly, earnestly, and expectantly, asking God to work in ways larger than that one exam we want to pass.  He challenged us to pray BIG-- to ask for BIG prayers from a BIG God!

"and the prayer of faith will save the one who is sick, and the Lord will raise him up." (James 5:15a)

How awesome is it that we each have a direct connection to the creator and savior of the universe.  

"Prayer is the most practical and powerful thing in the world, for it moves the Hand that moves the universe" ~ David Dickson 

Pure Excitement

"A new path lies before us;

We're not sure where it leads;

But God goes on before us,

Providing all our needs.

This path, so new, so different

Exciting as we climb,

Will guide us in His perfect will

Until the end of time."

~Linda Maurice 

I have not posted in a while, but boy do I have some awesome news!! 

My roommate (Danielle) and I are officially going to be Bible Study leaders for Freshman girls next year!!!!!!  We are seriously so excited, and cannot wait to see what God has in store for us during our Sophomore year, and the years to come!  We will be leading this Bible Study through Campus Crusade for Christ, which is the largest christian ministry on campus (i think). (For more information on this ministry please visit:   http://www.ncsucrusade.com/index.php) .  Looking back on this year, I see how much I have grown, and how much God has strengthened me in my faith-- He has truly answered many prayers and has revealed Himself to me over and over again in so many ways.  Please pray for us as we lean on God to provide us with the words and ways to glorify Him and teach of His truths in the months to come.  Please also pray for the girls that He places in our paths and those He leads to this ministry.  We feel so blessed by this opportunity, and look forward to seeing God's work ahead!

"Make me to know your ways oh Lord;  teach me your paths.  Lead me in your truth and teach me , for you are the God of my salvation;  for you I wait all the day long." ~Psalm 25:4-5